As parents, divorce is the start of a new relationship

As a parent, divorce is not the end of your relationship with your spouse. It is the start of a new one. When you divorce, you cease to be spouses who live and parent together and become co-parents. Thinking of and referring to each other as “my co-parent” rather than “my ex” sets a more positive tone. It helps you focus on the task at hand rather than the problems of the past.

How can you create a good co-parenting relationship?

Putting your child’s well-being first will help them get over your divorce. Here are some things to consider:

  • School events: When one parent is missing because the two of you cannot bear to be in the same room together, your child will suffer the most. It is crucial you both attend meeting with teachers. They play a vital role in helping your child through a difficult time.
  • The big decisions: You do not need a conference call to decide what color sweater your child should wear or what they should eat for dinner. However, there are certain decisions where it is best if as coparents you decide together: things such as what age your child can get a tattoo, which college they go to or what age they can sleepover at their girlfriend’s. It avoids your child feeling caught in the middle.
  • Special days: When you create a custody plan, remember that not all days are equal. There are some days such as birthdays and Christmas where your child might want to see both of you.

Co-parenting will be difficult at times. Yet, it is crucial to put your differences aside and do your best together for your child.

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