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Can your child decide which parent to live with?

When parents get divorced, they may need to set up a custody arrangement to decide where the child will live. In many cases, shared custody is used, meaning the child lives with one parent for a certain amount of time and then moves to the other house on a set schedule. In other cases, one parent has sole custody, so the child only lives with them.

Parents are often focused on what they want, but you may be wondering if your child’s desires will play a role. For instance, maybe your child has told you that they would like to live with you and not with your ex. Are they able to make this decision? Will the court only work with the parents, or will they also ask the child what they would prefer regarding a custody solution?

The child’s best interests

As a general rule, the court will consider numerous factors, determine what will be in the child’s best interests, and then issue a court order that aligns with those interests. Usually, it’s assumed that it’s best for a child to see both parents unless there is a very clear reason why they shouldn’t.

During this process, older children may be asked if they have a preference, and the court can consider this. However, this is typically only done with teenagers who have expressed a strong preference, not with younger children.

Even if your child tells the court they want to live with you, that doesn’t mean the court will approve such a custody solution. The court is under no obligation to do what your child asks. It’s just one of the factors they will weigh along with others while trying to determine what will work best moving forward.

Child custody and other issues

Determining custody rights is just one part of getting divorced. At this time, it’s very important to understand all the legal steps you should take.